Radiant's blog

I'm seeing him for the first time tomorrow  I'm excited  but tensed  I don't know what to expect  I'm curious  A little worried what he is going to look like
Something in me tells me there's something good in him Like I'm going to discover myself, live the life I've always wanted  I'm going to be happy  I'm eager to see him Yet I'm concerned I want to be free Will he let me live my fantasies Or will he make me rot in the drudgery of expected roles?
I can't wait to embrace him But I want to be assured I'll be safe with him
I have mixed feelings 
Queasy yet expectant  Like one who's expecting, anticipating yet a little worried about the pangs
When tomorrow comes I'll be with him And I'll do my best And trust God for the rest
Come my dear 2016!

It seems I was thoroughly misunderstood in my last post. I got calls from concerned friends telling me to be strong-hearted 'cause life is tough and I'll face worse situations. I've decided to write this to explain what I casually said then. Maybe someone would be able to relate to it and proffer help based on experience. 
There are some people that have larger tear glands than others. They say they have the gift of tears. They are not necessarily emotional people. A lot of times their crying has nothing to do with how they feel about the situation they are crying about. Let me tell you how it is with me. 
I could cry wolf in emotional events and I could cry same in ordinary events. I cry when I see excellence displayed like when I'm in a concert, watching a singer or a dancer. I remember crying the first time I saw Jackie Evancho's YouTube videos. I still cry when I watch those performances she did when she was ten/eleven. It's understandable that I cried for Pa…

You haven't heard from me for like a month now and you're wondering whatever happened to the passionate and chatty Radiant. Well, I just got stuck in the writer's block. You know I always wait for some kind of inspiration to hit me before I start writing. But today, I was reading a blog post by an 18yr old college girl and it struck me that I had actually strayed from my roots. I used to just write about things that happen to me and that's what blogging is about, right? Like a log of events, call it a journal, a diary, whatever. But recently I've been more concerned with writing a perfect story. So it's not really like I had the writer's block but I've written many things which I didn't think were good enough so I just dumped them. I want to be that blogger that whenever you see her post, you just have to read it 'cause you know it's not going to be a waste of your time- she really has something interesting to say, not just another joker suf…